Weather Report

by  Diane Payne

While the meteorologists stood there pointing at their forecasts on the local news stations, people were making dinner, tossing treats to their cats, filling dog bowls, reminding kids to do their homework, & stretching their heads to get a glimpse of the mundane weather report: one more cloudless day, no rain in sight, get out there & enjoy the perfect fall weather, so the people went back to mashing their potatoes, adding up numbers, & the cats hoped for more treats, but it wasn’t until the dogs barked to be left outside that everyone, from coast to coast, highlands to lowlands, noticed the snowflakes falling from the sky; unlike  in the 70 degree deserts, where the snowflakes simply disappeared when they hit the warm ground, those living in cooler climates watched the snow cover their lawns, & some mumbled, “Shit, it’s too early to snow,” which no one in the desert mumbled as they did odd little dances outside in their shorts & the swimmers doing endless laps at the city pools had no idea snowflakes were landing on their bodies as they mindlessly repeated lap after lap & people at the TV stations started pointing out the window, trying to alert the meteorologists of the falling snow & some stopped pointing at their weather maps & just shook their heads, while a few made the mistake of cursing, “Damn, this is incredible,” & the stoic meteorologists  with a pressing message said, “And people still don’t believe in climate change, well, let me tell you, global warming doesn’t mean we won’t get colder temperatures” & most everyone lost interest in the nightly news & stepped outside to become a part of the news, believing the snow was only happening in their town; but, it was happening all over the world, in locations that never experienced snow, on islands in the tropics, where, eventually, the temperatures started to cool & the snow started to pile on the ground & many people didn’t even own socks, because who needs socks on a tropical island & snowmen emerged along the shores, throughout the deserts & everyone started singing “Frosty the snowman was a very jolly soul…” in different languages & musicians took out their bongo drums &  harmonicas & sensitive dogs howled & cats covered their ears, no one went to school or a job because there were snowmen & igloos to build & those living behind bars beat on their cells begging to go outside, because they knew exactly what was falling from the sky, nothing could be more unjust than them locked behind bars while those fools sang that damn song over & over, oblivious to the cold, blind to the fact that there could be no tomorrow, while they foolishly made their snow angels & snow men, but no snow cones because hunger hadn’t set it & the only ones watching the news were the prisoners, shouting at the TV: “You don’t know shit about that white powder falling from the sky!” while the people dragged blankets, sleeping bags, hay & pillows to their newly built igloos singing that damn Frosty song throughout the night, while those sleeping faraway could hear the lyrics of unknown languages blowing across the oceans, deserts & fields, yet, only the meteorologists questioned why the snow was falling & when it would stop, and a few meteorologist started losing it and started singing their predicaments: Frosty the Snowman, was a very hungry man because it snowed so much the corn wouldn’t grow, and the plants all died away… but, no one was listening to the news,  all electronic devices remained in the empty houses while the people huddled in igloos, blissfully unaware.

 

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